Arsenic Afternoons

I don't know what teachers give kids right before going home but the moment they step off the bus until after supper time is when they are absolutely bouncing off the walls. Perhaps it's the long hours they sit listening quietly. Perhaps it's the fact that they have had to behave all day long. Whatever it is, when S gets off the bus, she is loaded for bear. She will go tearing into the house. I follow the trail of clothing that she is yanking off and simultaneously turning inside out (it's uncanny) to remind her that it is too cold out to wear a pink tutu and snow boots.

Then it's like she is coming off a week long fast. She is hhhhhhhhhhhhuuuuuuuuuuuungry (imagine this in a high decibel whine). A small snack is not enough even though I know she won't eat any supper if she eats more. Then it's bouncing off the walls about what's in her bookbag, and what's for supper, and when is K getting home ("Same time as every other day", I say), can she go outside, can I play with her, when can she have a friend over, she doesn't want to ride her bike, is "Hannah Montana" on (I say, "Death to Hannah Montana"...well, at least in my head I do)...

This runs for two hours straight. K gets home 45 minutes later and she has usually gotten a little sleepy on the bus ride but hits the ground running nonetheless. And the chaos escalates.

My sister Renee calls this "Arsenic time" - because you either want to give some or take some yourself. Darren gets home about halfway through the "arsenic time" and while I would love to give him a moment to detox and relax after work, the reality is the girls usually attach themselves to each of his legs while I am in the background trying to clean up spilled drinks, dirty clothes, etc. He can see the steam starting to rise off my head and my eyeballs shooting flames out of their sockets and knows I am T minus 10 seconds from what Bill Cosby would call "A conniption". He sighs, puts down his laptop bag, and shuffles the girls outside to play.

I'm not sure if this is a phase all kids go through. With my luck, if it is, it will last until they are 18.

I'll be back, after these messages, and a dose of arsenic.