Painful Flattery for a Secret Keeper

My sister Renee issued an invitation for the me and the two Squirrels to attend a Secret Keeper slumber party to use up a package Renee had bought at a recent Secret Keeper event with her daughter "Amazing" Grace.  The Squirrels could barely contain their excitement since this particular slumber party involved staying overnight at a hotel with a pool AND would be attended by their red-headed cousins - Abigail, Rachel, and Rebekah (or, as our nickname-laden family calls them, "Sass", "Duke" and "Bucky"...yes, such flattering nicknames). 

We had adjoining rooms at a local Holiday Inn Express and the girls no sooner stepped inside the door then they began devouring mass quantities of sugar and caffeine.  Clothes and flip flops were flying through the air as they dug into their suitcases to unearth their swim suits, then down to the pool for some fun. 

Later on, Renee had activities plan to teach the girls how to keep confidences and treat others with kindness and respect.  The favorite activity involved the girls using fabric markers on white pillowcases to write kind words about each other.  Each girl had a pillowcase with their name on it, then the girls cycled around the different pillowcases and were to write something and draw a picture of something that reminded them of the particular girl whose name was on the pillowcase. 

All was going well until Eli came to Katybird's pillowcase.  My kids are the best of friends and worst of enemies.  Eli is the typical older sister that thinks her younger sister is boring and babyish.  Kate thinks her older sister is bossy and mean.  Eli was taking a while to think and then finally....PAINFULLY...wrote the following:

"Nice sometimes"

Meanwhile, Mary's daughter Abigail wrote this glowing review for her own sister:

Rachel, you are the best thing that ever happened. 

I don't know what I'd do without you.  You fill my day with love!!"

Perhaps my favorite, though, was what Rachel wrote on friend Audrey's pillowcase:

"Satan is mean, his followers are too but totally not you!"

Mmmm...what a warm and fuzzy endorsement to lay your head on at night, Duke!

"Taling" Care of the "Nose"

A couple of Saturdays ago, I spent a marathon day cleaning out the garage and the storage room, the last two bastions of chaos that I had been dreading.  We finally broke down and listed our house with a real estate agent (and chafe against the 6 1/2 % commission somewhat)...who so far has gotten less showings than I did but hey, our realtor knows Ted Nugent and was going to call him to see if he (or his hunting buddies) want a little house in a big woods with lots of deer you can shoot from your front porch before you even finish your morning coffee...

But I digress...

So anyway, I was so exhausted I fell into a chair just to unkink my back muscles.  Little Katybird tiptoes up to me and hands me this note:

For those of you who can't read Katybirdese...it says:

"Dear mom
I noe (know) you are having a hard time taling (taking) care of the nose (house).
from Kate to mom"

Awww...perhaps I will stop ranting about how I work my fingers to the bone and feel like the household maid around here.

"Still"water in Turmoil Upon Exit of K Sisterhood

In mid-August, the sleepy little town of Stillwater, MN was accosted out of a sound slumber by the arrival of 13 female members of the K sisterhood.  Leading the charge was matriarch Ellie followed by 7 daughters and 5 nieces. 

Aurora Staples Inn Bed & Breakfast owners reported that much noise and laughter shook the walls of their 100+ year old home while faint glimpses of heavily robed nieces could be seen stumbling to the breakfast table each morning. 

The downtown area business owners also reported that shopping maven Beth was seen single-handedly reviving the area economy.  "You know, we were heading for an economic bust, ja?  But then this crazy lady came in bought one of everything in every color!" stated Margoot Helglerood, owner of the Fun Sisters Boutique. 

The back of the trolley car was also weighted down by the presence of the Babbling Baker's Dozen (as the town had dubbed them) and their plethora of fudge purchases. 

But perhaps most disturbing were these images captured by hidden camera of the 13 women seen trying valiantly to capture the funniest picture of their lips doing the "bbbbbb" sound.  Or trying to capture a picture of their cheeks stretched to capacity doing a loose-jawed violent head shake. 

Nonetheless, the K Sisterhood left behind a wake of destruction as they exited the town on Sunday morning.  Residents and business owners alike unlocked their doors again and took long naps to recover.  The Governor of Minnesota has officially declared Stillwater a disaster area and FEMA is on its way to spearhead recovery efforts.