So Much for the SHOW ME State

I can say with absolute certainty that the definition of insanity is trying to keep a house in a "show ready" state while you have young children.  Seriously.  I may have a stroke. 

Case in point is the last three weeks.  In preparation for moving down to South Texas to join Isaiah 55 Deaf Ministries, our big house in the little woods has gone on the market.  When I calculated what a 6% realtor commission would be, I made a decision that we would go the For Sale by Owner route.  Hours of cleaning later, I staged the house and took photos and made a mental TO DO list of all the things we had meant to do but hadn't in the three years since we have built the house. 

We had our first open house, complete with classical music playing in the background and the smell of freshly baked chocolate chip cookies.  The Squirrels and Hounds were carted off by Husband as a slow death by licking (from the dogs) is not exactly endearing to potential home buyers. 

During the next showing, Husband was halfway through his two week stint in Australia for Mama Yellow so I was left to my own devices to get the house ready.  I called in reinforcements (my mother) since I have not mowed a lawn in 15 years.  Not that I am not able...growing up, I spent many moons on the riding lawnmower on our farm in Iowa.  That's how I got my golden tan each summer.  Mom somehow overlooked our indecent swimwear if we were mowing the yard.  Or walking beans. 

But I digress...

So my mom came up to mow, resplendent in 45 layers despite the record temperatures, and her infamous straw mowing hat the screams Maxine from the Hallmark greeting cards.  Our riding mower was outside during a rather nasty windstorm that took the hood off the mower so now our mower is more of a Ghetto variety.  Plus, the cat likes to curl up in the engine compartment so the mower is probably rife with cat hair. My mom was not done mowing by the time the potential homebuyers arrived so she told me not to tell them she was my mom.  Like I am going to pretend some random lady is mowing my yard???

Again, I digress...

The lovely couple showed up with their two children to look at the house.  Much gushing later, they began to load up into their SUV.  Eli comes around the corner and shouts "DID THEY BUY IT?" to which I discretely tried to tell her a house is not something you plunk down cash on the spot for.  "YYYYEEEESSS!" she shouts while making fist pumping motions (she is not exactly overjoyed to be moving away from friends and a chance to weave the Maypole at school...a big deal for 4th graders).  The potential home buyers find this quite funny.  I wanted to crawl under the porch. 

A mere 6 days later is showing number 4.   This time, it is a single guy who is more interested in roaming the acres of woods in search of lot lines (which we have a hard time finding).  Typical guy.  They want to "walk the property line" and know how deep the well is.  The women want to know if the water is clear and if the trampoline is staying. 

As this single guy and his friend prepare to enter the house, my homeless-looking children, double-fisting cheese curls after playing outside all day, are sitting beside me on the porch swing.  May I mention here that it is a little weird to just turn your house over to others to wander through?  Who knows if they are opening up all my drawers and closets (which could be dangerous...).  The guys are almost in the house when Elisabeth shouts "CAN YOU KILL THAT SPIDER?".  I nudge her and she shouts "WHAT?" (she has one decibel level...and it's called SONIC BOOM).  I whisper that she does not need to mention spiders while people are looking at the house.  She stomps off wailing. 

Lovely.  So much for creating a mood of peace and serenity.  I could use some of that right now as I wait for our house to sell and try to undo the mass destruction caused in short order by two half-pint Squirrels with no school to distract them while trying to accommodate short notice for showings.  It's going to be a long summer...

Groovy Shoes & Strikes to Spare

Our local adoption support group had a free evening of bowling on a night that just happened to coincide with Eli's 9th birthday.  Husband was tied up in one of his interminable meeting of the minds at Big Yellow so I loaded up two spastic squirrels and headed to the Christian Center in P-town. 

Katybird decided she wanted to a green ball and wanted to bowl all by herself.  She could barely lift the ball before managing to fling it with a loud THUD on the lane.  The ball would roll ssssssllllllllooooooooooowwly down the lane (I think I saw a snail speeding past at one point) before barely knocking over a few pins.  I tried to get her to add a little oomph to her throw but her bird arms just weren't strong enough. 

Meanwhile, Eli thought this was like throwing a softball and would launch her bowling ball well into the air.  The attendant came rushing over and pulled up our bumpers or alas, Eli would have scored an 8 on her entire game.  She was very distraught that slow little Katybird managed to get a spare but Eli kept getting splits. 

Much free pizza, pop, and ice cream later, we played outside for a while before heading home.  (Note long hair on Eli...yep, my human hair extensions.  Was up at O Dark Thirty pressing her hair and adding these in so she could feel pretty on her birthday.  Sigh....)

Just a quick shout out...selected bowling alleys across the country are offering free passes for kids to bowl all summer long.  Go to http://www.kidsbowlfree.com/ to sign up.  Kids must be 15 years of age or younger.  Adults can get a summer pass for $24.95 for two games a day.  (Thanks, KF, for the heads up). 

Katybird's New Ditty

About every 3 months, Katybird crawls in my bed at O Dark Thirty and tells me she has a headache.  The first time it happened, I gave her some Tylenol and sent her to school.  She promptly threw up in her first grade classroom so now I know to tuck her back in bed and let her sleep it off...and to let her throw up at home.  Whatever ails her usually clears up by noon and then, all caught up on sleep, she is in rare form (and sans her Magic Blue Pill AKA ADHD med). 

This last Thursday was such a day.  By the early evening, Katybird had donned her pink princess dress and made up a new song for me:



I am without words. 

(Facebook followers will need to click on "View Original Post" to see the YouTube embedded video on my regular blog site). 

92 Year Old Has First Piano Recital

Last Friday, in the fair city of T town, in a small, chestnutty place on the south end of town, piano virtuoso Cleo K made his debut appearance as the oldest piano student of teaching phenom Meg K.  Cleo, a twice widower, made most recently so by the loss of the lovely Nancy K (dubbed "Grandma Nancy" by my kids) late last year. 

Cleo, in an effort to ease boredom, began taking piano lessons early this year.  His goal?  To play the "Starlight Waltz", the last song he ever practiced when taking lessons with his daughter 50 some years ago. 

The recital hall was packed by the many parents of other students and half the T town AC church that Cleo had invited.  After a dazzling display by the younger students, Cleo took the bench with a flourish, shuffled his piano music, and wowed us all.  He even had an encore number prepared. 

(Facebook reading my streaming notes will need to click on "View original post" to see embedded video)



Cleo declined to be filmed and interviewed by the local TV station.  "Why would they want to interview me?" he asked.  "Is what I am doing so unusual?"  Ummmm...yep...and may we all be so bold should we make it to 92!

 Cleo, 92, with granddaughter Abigail, age 9. 

Making a Run for the Border

In case you haven't heard...there is some BIG NEWS for my little family of Squirrels and Nuts.  This is a copy of an email I sent:

This Sunday (May 1st), we will be announcing to our church that Darren and I are moving to McAllen, TX (right across the border from Reynosa, Mexico) to join the Isaiah 55 Deaf Ministries mission group http://www.isaiah55.org/ . We had also planned on missions as a “second career” (i.e. when we became empty nesters) but God has made it very clear that the time is NOW!


About Isaiah 55 Deaf Ministries

Isaiah 55 Deaf Ministries was started by Nolton (“NoNo”) and Kate Beale to build schools for the deaf in Mexico. Currently, Mexico has no deaf education system so the deaf are either ignored or “integrated” into regular classrooms but not taught sign language nor provided a sign language interpreter. Isaiah 55 trains teachers, finds deaf students, and integrates them into a K-12 classroom. The parents come in for sign language classes on Fridays and two national pastors also lead Bible studies for the students and families. http://vimeo.com/7948385 My sister Erin has been serving as a missionary with this group for the last 8 years. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Jd4uvrJhA0w Construction has started on a second school in Reynosa and the plan is to build additional schools as funding and time allow.

We hope to come alongside the work that the I55 team is already doing and support them in communications, construction, medical work teams, and anything else they need us to do. We will live stateside for the time being so the girls can continue to go to school and cross the border as needed to work with I55. Erin lives in the city of Reynosa with another missionary from Morton, IL named Kim Kaiser who has been there as long as Erin.

To answer some of your questions:

Uh, like is your head going to end up in a duffle bag?

Sure hope not but YES, we know of the violence in Mexico. There are two major drug cartels with infighting in the cartels as well as fighting with each other. They are mostly targeting each other and not Americans but there is a risk that innocent bystanders will be caught in the crossfire. Reynosa has been relatively peaceful as the news you hear about mass graves and such is about 90 minutes away and Juarez, the murder capital of the world, is all the way over across the border from El Paso, TX. The needs of the deaf, however, do not cease to exist in the midst of this uncertainty. And if God has called us to serve here, we trust He will protect us until His purposes are accomplished.

How soon are you leaving?

As soon as the house sells, we plan to move to McAllen, TX. We will attend Mission Training International (MTI) in Colorado for an intensive 3 week course (our kids attend training as well). We will attend an intensive language school in McAllen to learn Spanish and will attend classes at I55 to learn Mexican sign language.

The economy stinks. Are you going to hit us up for money?

I will continue to work at least part-time for the company I currently work for until the arrangement no longer works for the company or for me. My current job allows quite a bit of flexibility to work during different hours and to work from home, which I have LOVED the past five years. This will account for approximately 50% of our income. In addition, since we adopted from the US foster care system, they continue to pay a “board rate” for the girls until they reach the age of 18. This will account for 13% of our income. The remaining 37% we will need to raise. The missionaries at Isaiah 55 are not supported by any of the monies donated to I55 but keep separate accounts with a sending organization called Go Ye Fellowship. That way, there is no opportunity for the abuse of I55 donated funds being siphoned towards “administrative” costs instead of directly benefiting the students, teachers, and school construction and maintenance.

Fundraising is something I used to completely dread as I felt like I would be begging for money but here is the deal...God is able to provide for us no matter what. When Darren was laid off in 2009, we learned how much “security” we had placed in his job. God took care of us then and He will take care of us now. If you feel called to support us, either by prayer or by funding, that’s awesome but if not, we know that God has not called us to this and then left us to flounder on our own.

So you’ll be like 74 miles from South Padre Island? Can we come crash your pad and visit Isaiah 55?

For sure. Consider this a standing invitation. I’ll even learn to cook a proper enchilada in your honor. We would love to show you and your family the students and the mission that has absolutely captured our hearts and to share the story of God’s call on our lives! Most major airlines fly into McAllen (just ask all the snow birds AKA “winter Texans”) and Southwest Airlines has a hub not far away in Harlingen, TX.

And YES, we do plan to become foster licensed again.  You may find it interesting that the tagline for Isaiah 55 is "Esperanza para los sordos" which means "Hope for the Deaf".  So my blog ID of "Adventures in Fostering Hope" still applies!

The Finishing Touch

Overheard in the back of the Blue Bus while taking Squirrels to school this morning:

Kate (in a sing-songy voice):  "Nobody will play with me.  Nobody will play with me outside for recess."

Elisabeth (voice dripping with disdain):  "Is that the song you are going to sing when you try out for 'American Idol'?"

Kate (arms crossed, emphatic):  "Yes.  But when I am older, I am going to put some touches on it." 

It may be pitchy, Dawg, but I'll give it a 10.  It has a good beat and you can dance to it.

Inmates Threaten to Take Over Asylum

I'm done apologizing for my lack of postage on the blog.  I once had a dream that I would be "discovered" by the Huffington Post as the newest MUST READ thirtysomething blogger but have since decided I may have been delusional.  I am blaming it on my allergy medication. All the world is right when you are in a fog.  Even my bone-crunching chiropractic back adjustments no longer make me shout aloud and have visions of my head popping off my neck and rolling down the street. 

But I digress...

The truth is, we have spent the last few weeks in the trenches with the kids.  I have made no secret of my frustration to parent ADHD children but things took a turn for the worse when I, having all the best intentions, set up in-home counseling for Eli.  As a part of the therapy process, we began attending adoption support group to meet with other parents about adoption issues. 

Believe me, my eyes were opened.  You've all heard of the extreme cases of foster kids who just seem to have their wires crossed.  Well, these parents have lived (and are living) through it.  I give them props for seeking the resources to help their children but some of the symptoms they mentioned (wildly vacillating mood swings, defiance, outburst of anger at parental figures - namely Mom) were eerily familiar.  I began to wonder what was going to manifest in the future for Eli. 

Well, this is probably the reason why no one should take abnormal psych classes without their own personal psychologist.  Self-diagnosis can be a dangerous thing.  Turns out that after a few weeks of counseling - that brought up a whole host of memories and feelings for Eli - we have FINALLY turned a corner. 

Add to that I finally found a parenting book that is realistic and fairly easy to follow - Dr Kevin Leman's "Have a New Kid by Friday".  I learned that the problem was not Eli at all.  It was ME! (most of you are not surprised at all by this revelation).  I was so worried that Eli's  and Kate's lack of discipline and structure in their formative years by previous family members would adversely affect them without me stepping in as Drill Sergeant Mom.  I am the "authoritarian" parent Dr. Leman describes and it was not fun to hear myself described. 

So I am committed to not overreacting to Eli needling me endlessly about the "Never Evers" ("You NEVER let me do this", "You mean I will NEVER EVER get to have a friend over again?") and to suppress the urge to try to sway her thinking.  I am committed to saying something once, turning my back, and walking away so as not to let the "hedonistic ankle biters" (hey, that's what the good Dr. calls them) manipulate me into a corner where the inmates threaten to take over the asylum and in the fear for my sanity, I give in just to get them to QUIT WHINING! 

I've tried other parenting books before, like Lisa Whelchel's "Creative Correction" and the foster care highly-touted "1-2-3 Magic" (nothing is magical when you have a daughter who continues to follow you needling or one who throws herself to the ground and sobs uncontrollable because she cannot have pop for breakfast or when both of them continue to shout from time out about how much they hate me and how life is unfair and they wish they could live somewhere else because their parents are mean). 

We've had relative peace here on the Cougarville front so let's hope and pray I can stay focused and calm.  Until the teenage years hit, at least.  Then Clairol home hair dye and I are going to develop an intimate relationship so I can cover the signs of my stress.  And there will be teeth puncture marks in my pillow.