Back in Mint Green Again

Last Friday night was the long-awaited premiere of "Courageous".  I went online and bought tickets ahead of time as I remembered the opening night of "Fireproof" was pretty much sold out. 

After the movie, Husband was taking the babysitter home when he felt his heart go out of rhythm.  He came home and extended his wrist to me to double-check.  Sure enough...his heart was in a-fib again.  I remembered all too well the last time he went into a-fib and figured this time, I wouldn't send him to prompt care by himself! 

Luckily, my sister Erin was out our house, having spent the day being honored as the 2011 Outstanding Alum from E College.  We whispered to her that we were going to tuck the kids in bed and then head over to the Big O hospital ER. 

30 minutes later, we pulled into the zoo, I mean, ER and had the privilege of encountering every belligerent drunk in P town.  Several were milling around the ER while the male nurse at the triage desk looked like he could use a stiff cup of coffee and 18 hours of uninterrupted sleep.  There was a lady in a wheel chair right inside the door who was hyperventilating and moaning while her friend fluttered around her asking questions.  The triage desk paid her nary one iota of attention.  She could be in there every Friday night, for all I know.  After all, the hospital is a not-for-profit so they do not turn anyone away. 

But I digress...

One quick pulse check later, Husband was being wheeled down to Room 211 for what looked to be a very long stay.  The last time he went into a-fib, they tried shocking him twice to no avail.  36 hours later, his heart corrected itself.  This time we were in the first 2 hours of a-fib so we hoped for different results. 

After donning yet another fashion-forward mint green hospital gown, getting laden with lots of sticky pads, lines, IVs, monitor beeps, and much consultation by three doctors, the best course of action was determined to be shocking again.  I was told that I would need to leave the room since it was unpleasant to watch and Husband was administered a heavy dose of what the doctors now call the "Michael Jackson" drug...a conscious sedation with amnesiac after-effects (I gotta get me some of that...for me or the Squirrels...either way, a clear winner!)

By this time, it was 1:30 in the morning and I had been playing several Solitaire games on my company iPad and trying to read to stay awake.  A quick prayer of "Lord, please heal him completely.  I'd sure like to go home tonight." later, the doctor poked his head out of the room and told me Husband had converted to normal rhythm after the first jolt.  HALLELUJAH!  Discharge took another 45 minutes and by 3:00 AM, we were both back home and in bed. 

Which was a good thing...because I was about ready to do a flying leap and land an elbow thump to his rib cage if his heart was going to be stubborn.  Evidently date nights with me are dangerous!

Painful Flattery for a Secret Keeper

My sister Renee issued an invitation for the me and the two Squirrels to attend a Secret Keeper slumber party to use up a package Renee had bought at a recent Secret Keeper event with her daughter "Amazing" Grace.  The Squirrels could barely contain their excitement since this particular slumber party involved staying overnight at a hotel with a pool AND would be attended by their red-headed cousins - Abigail, Rachel, and Rebekah (or, as our nickname-laden family calls them, "Sass", "Duke" and "Bucky"...yes, such flattering nicknames). 

We had adjoining rooms at a local Holiday Inn Express and the girls no sooner stepped inside the door then they began devouring mass quantities of sugar and caffeine.  Clothes and flip flops were flying through the air as they dug into their suitcases to unearth their swim suits, then down to the pool for some fun. 

Later on, Renee had activities plan to teach the girls how to keep confidences and treat others with kindness and respect.  The favorite activity involved the girls using fabric markers on white pillowcases to write kind words about each other.  Each girl had a pillowcase with their name on it, then the girls cycled around the different pillowcases and were to write something and draw a picture of something that reminded them of the particular girl whose name was on the pillowcase. 

All was going well until Eli came to Katybird's pillowcase.  My kids are the best of friends and worst of enemies.  Eli is the typical older sister that thinks her younger sister is boring and babyish.  Kate thinks her older sister is bossy and mean.  Eli was taking a while to think and then finally....PAINFULLY...wrote the following:

"Nice sometimes"

Meanwhile, Mary's daughter Abigail wrote this glowing review for her own sister:

Rachel, you are the best thing that ever happened. 

I don't know what I'd do without you.  You fill my day with love!!"

Perhaps my favorite, though, was what Rachel wrote on friend Audrey's pillowcase:

"Satan is mean, his followers are too but totally not you!"

Mmmm...what a warm and fuzzy endorsement to lay your head on at night, Duke!

"Taling" Care of the "Nose"

A couple of Saturdays ago, I spent a marathon day cleaning out the garage and the storage room, the last two bastions of chaos that I had been dreading.  We finally broke down and listed our house with a real estate agent (and chafe against the 6 1/2 % commission somewhat)...who so far has gotten less showings than I did but hey, our realtor knows Ted Nugent and was going to call him to see if he (or his hunting buddies) want a little house in a big woods with lots of deer you can shoot from your front porch before you even finish your morning coffee...

But I digress...

So anyway, I was so exhausted I fell into a chair just to unkink my back muscles.  Little Katybird tiptoes up to me and hands me this note:

For those of you who can't read Katybirdese...it says:

"Dear mom
I noe (know) you are having a hard time taling (taking) care of the nose (house).
from Kate to mom"

Awww...perhaps I will stop ranting about how I work my fingers to the bone and feel like the household maid around here.

"Still"water in Turmoil Upon Exit of K Sisterhood

In mid-August, the sleepy little town of Stillwater, MN was accosted out of a sound slumber by the arrival of 13 female members of the K sisterhood.  Leading the charge was matriarch Ellie followed by 7 daughters and 5 nieces. 

Aurora Staples Inn Bed & Breakfast owners reported that much noise and laughter shook the walls of their 100+ year old home while faint glimpses of heavily robed nieces could be seen stumbling to the breakfast table each morning. 

The downtown area business owners also reported that shopping maven Beth was seen single-handedly reviving the area economy.  "You know, we were heading for an economic bust, ja?  But then this crazy lady came in bought one of everything in every color!" stated Margoot Helglerood, owner of the Fun Sisters Boutique. 

The back of the trolley car was also weighted down by the presence of the Babbling Baker's Dozen (as the town had dubbed them) and their plethora of fudge purchases. 

But perhaps most disturbing were these images captured by hidden camera of the 13 women seen trying valiantly to capture the funniest picture of their lips doing the "bbbbbb" sound.  Or trying to capture a picture of their cheeks stretched to capacity doing a loose-jawed violent head shake. 

Nonetheless, the K Sisterhood left behind a wake of destruction as they exited the town on Sunday morning.  Residents and business owners alike unlocked their doors again and took long naps to recover.  The Governor of Minnesota has officially declared Stillwater a disaster area and FEMA is on its way to spearhead recovery efforts. 

Cannibalistic Goldfish & "Pichr Suls"

School started with a bang this year!  Eli and Katybird got to pick out their first day of school outfits by themselves with no direction from me.  Turns out that they must like hot pink glittery retina-burning '80s throwback clothing.  Ah well...

Eli came bursting through the door after school, delighted that she had been assigned to put up and take down the flag outside the school.  Evidently this is a big honor in the 4th grade (aside from weaving the maypole at the end of the year and scraping plates at lunch).  Eli was very worried that she couldn't fulfill her obligations.  "Mom, can we practice with my blanket?  I have to fold the flag in a triangle.  And it can't touch the ground.  And I can't reach the rope to untie it. And can you take me to school early because I want to make sure I have time to take care of the flag?"  Ooo...the pressure builds. 

And Katybird took the entrepreneurial route, painting watercolor blobs on paper the day before school started.  "I'm going to sell these, Mom.  I think I'll charge $50.".  I told her 25 cents was more like it.  "That's what I meant." she said.  She printed a sign and everything!

Benny D from her class was her one and only customer.  And either Katybird overcharged him or Benny can't count money any better than Kate can.  We told her that she should have only collected 25 cents from him and she started whimpering, "Well, I didn't know how much he gave me because I...can't...(sob, hiccup)...count MONEY!"  Given the choice of offering Benny a refund or more pictures, she felt certain he would choose more pictures.  Who wouldn't want more pictures of blobs on paper? 

And finally, Husband took the girls to ReggieFest this past weekend and came home with...goldfish.  We have no bowl, no food, and no ability to keep sensitive plants and animals alive.  I gave him a tired look and Big D muttered, "Well, that's what the prize was!"  Whoever decided goldfish make good prizes must have spent too much time in the beer tent. 

So alas, Husband turned my Tupperware bowl into a fish bowl and the Squirrels christened "Sunshine", "Goldie" and "Jane" (I'm deeply flattered.)  They thought that the goldfish would want to eat crackers with their namesake but it sounded a bit cannibalistic to me!  We didn't need a goldfish Donner party going on in the bowl.  Instead, we opted for instant mashed potato flakes and crushed up saltines. 

We found Goldie floating dead in the water when we returned from church the following day.  After carefully removing him (or her...who can tell with goldfish) from his/her brief home, Husband carried Goldie gently to the local porcelain throne room.  Eli had a touching eulogy and prayer.  Katybird flushed the toilet while shouting "So long, Sucker!" (I'm not making this up). 

And so life continues trying to keep Sunshine and Jane alive.  I'm working to convince Squirrels that they need to release the fish back into nature.  Truth be told, I have a hard enough time keeping everyone else healthy and alive around here. 

Computer Advice from Mom: Live Screaming

My mom and her computer are not always a compatible match but this latest email from her relaying technical advice given by a local radio station when she called in to find out how to listen to her grandson's football game online is...well...nothing short of hilarious:

If anyone is interested in listening to Bennett's game on-line tonight, here is what K101fm told me: Go to www.oursiouxland.com, click on Local radio (middle right of home page), then click on Luverne Cardinals, K101, Catch the Live Broadcast; then you click on you scream or live scream or something such.


Mom

I, for one, am all up for a live "screaming" broadcast about high school football!  However, I think she meant "streaming". 

Stuck in Between Two Worlds

We've been stuck in a bit of a holding pattern here while we wait for our house to sell so we can head down to Reynosa, Mexico.  This whole "waiting on the Lord to move" thing is a bit tough for the hyper-planner in me.  I mean, I plan something and then plan a 2nd and 3rd contingency...so not knowing when God will remove this obstacle?  KILLING ME! 

Here's the deal.  Our hearts?  Already down in Mexico.  Our thoughts and prayers - already sent those on ahead.  Just my body is left back in the Midwest.  When you know WHERE you are supposed to go and yet aren't there yet, it feels like you are stuck somewhere in the middle.  I can't plan anything more than about 30 days out.  Friends are already starting to disengage because that's how they prepare for the fact that you won't necessarily be around for much longer. 

I registered the girls for school which was tough since I hoped we could transition before the school year started.  Despite multiple showings on the house, plenty of random people driving up my lane to ogle, and some rather interesting phone calls (one lady called asking if we would consider a land contract since she was going to begin receiving oil royalties - from oil found on her land and drilled by another party - but that banks wouldn't lend money under a conventional mortgage until she could show two years' worth of royalties)...the house is still on the market. 

The last two homes we sold took two days and nine days, respectively.  So you can imagine that my patience for keeping a house in a show-ready state for three months now is wearing thin....

But in the meantime, we keep doing what we can do.  We are officially accepted by our sending agency http://www.goyefellowship.org/ under Account #87 (for those who care to support our endeavor).  We finally made the staff page on Isaiah 55's website .  Our prayer magnets are at the printers and our prayer cards are being designed by my AWESOME sister-in-law Dena.  Our sending church has been extremely generous in their pledge to our support while on the field.  We have approximately $1,000 left to raise in monthly pledges to meet our first year fundraising goal. 

My Spanish needs help but I am not sure I could finish a semester at college if I enrolled (I still plan on God doing BIG things to get us down there in His perfect timing).  So we record the vision (Habakkuk 2: 2-3) and then we wait...and wait...and wait...and try to lower my control FREAK FLAG to at least half mast.

PS You can hear the testimony of our calling by visiting iTunes and downloading the 7/3/11 "Ordinary People, Extraordinary God" podcast.  The first 20 minutes or so is the recap by those that went to Reynosa on the June mission trip.  Then Husband and I both share the events that led up to our decision to make a run for the border.